Like an Easter Egg hunt, go and ‘Find your Purpose’ they say… but why, and how?
I’ve noticed many people find it too much to think about what their purpose for living is. It seems like they are kind of drifting from one thing to the next, reacting to what comes up. Or maybe their goal in life is very amorphous and vague, something like ‘family’ or ‘being successful.'
For much of human history, having a purpose as we think of it today, wasn’t really an issue because tradition was so strong, and most people were just trying to survive and have children through famine, war, and disease.
In the modern world, most people have space to reflect about where they would like to go in life, what to study and learn through education, what sort of job, the type of person they want to be, in short ‘meaning and purpose.'
The issue as I see it is that many of us still seem to just default to someone else’s purpose. It could be our parents’ expectations, what the social media algorithms want, the industrial/consumerist system wanting us to be a good worker-bee and purchaser of stuff we don’t really need.
But when I look at the social research, there does seem to be many psychological and health benefits when we define our own path in life, with a clear vision of how we want to bring some good into the world.
One finding shows only 25% of adults have a clear sense of purpose about what makes their lives meaningful. Yet this meaning and purpose is shown to be fundamental for our mental health? Is this why we hear so much about the ‘mental health crisis’?
Seneca, observed 2000 years ago, that, “If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favourable.”
So, if we want to, how can we find meaning and purpose?
The dark side of purpose: neediness
Firstly, let’s face it, purpose can have a dark side. For example, people who make their purpose wanting to:
Make lots of money by exploiting others
Control others (even entire countries) through the pursuit of power
Spreading ideologies of fear, hate and division
Be superior to others (while giving the impression of being ‘oh so virtuous’)
Live as a perpetual victim
Obsess over having the perfect body
Constantly seek pleasure at the expense of others
You could say, this dark side of purpose is just neediness, not really purpose in the true sense. In any case it should be avoided as it harms others, and also harms our own spirit, and diminishes our true potential.
The positive side of purpose
The positive side of meaning and purpose I am thinking of could include:
Growing and sharing my unique gifts as a person, for the benefit of others
Being a leader that helps grow and build positive communities
Shifting my life from being driven by fear, to being driven by love
Continually searching for and living in alignment to deeper wisdom
Living a life of self-inquiry into what is reality
What are your gifts?
Sometimes we think we are giving meaningfully, but we are really just adding to the mess of the already dysfunctional systems, relationships, patterns and ways our world.
It's helpful to ask of ourselves, what are our unique gifts and talents?
We were not born on to this earth to just scroll aimlessly through social media, and to do a job we hate, and then die. For the goal of finding meaning and purpose we need to look beyond social media and entertainment and recognise our own strengths and weaknesses.
In my next blog I will share some pointers to help you find our own, positive, meaning and purpose for our brief time here on planet earth.
"The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The work of life is to develop it. The meaning of life is to give your gift away" - David Viscott
I am now taking bookings for health coaching, yoga, personal training sessions at my Holmwood Road studio, Christchurch, New Zealand.
Jo Jarden is a personal trainer, yoga teacher, and the founder of Heart and Mind Yoga studio 54 Holmwood Road, Merivale, Christchurch. She has 12 year's experience as personal trainer, yoga teacher, and workshop facilitator including working with:
Business executives
Gyms, group yoga & fitness classes
Farmers and rural settings
Workplace retreats, events, and conferences
Her approach combines both body and mind practices to help people boost their health and general feelings of positivity. She utilises the combination of ancient yoga wisdom and wellbeing science techniques to help people release tension and grow their inner strengths.
Qualifications include:
Certified Yoga Teacher Santosha Yoga Institute, Registered Australian Yoga Alliance 2017
Certificate in Advanced Personal Training, Fit College New Zealand, 2016
Bachelor of Science with Honours Public Health. University of Canterbury, New Zealand 2006
Bachelor of Arts Mass Communication and Psychology. University of Canterbury, New Zealand 2005